Tea Break - Cinnamon

Without much ado, let me just say - 'tis one good tea :o).

I must admit, summer has been so summery this year. Result - I have never been home long enough to ponder and create a blog post. First, it was the last-term-of-school which meant sport days, school plays, assemblies, teacher meets, summer fairs and the volunteering it demanded, gifts to make for teachers ( we seldom buy, and if we do end up doing so, it is always a gift card for a bookstore), cards to make with kids, final parties to attend and the farewells. Everything x 2, as the boys are in different schools.

Any breathers in between always made me run to the park with a sandwich and a book, far from the drudgery of my hamster wheel.

So if I had imagined the summer holidays would be THE welcome break from all of it, well, I had the imagination of a school kid. That silly imagination minus really real reality = complexly complex universe that nobody living has ever fathomed :o( ! At least nobody with two adrenalin-filled time bombs that could go off innumerable times, still retaining the potency and power ( screaming sounds included) afresh for every strike!!!

And this is where the sun has really lighted up my days. Considering it is a stay-cation this year, I owe a lot to Ra / Surya / Helios/ Sol. All I had to do was to grab the picnic blanket and basket and take the boys to the park, bike and scooter and all. Then forget about them until they come back all fizzled out by the end of the day, head back home and before I know it, before they had even managed to ask for online time, they're dreaming away like mad!

Summer has also been a wonderful year for the Hay Day inspired farmers that we have been. What started as a casual strewing of some seeds suddenly became quite a bursting mini kitchen garden.

Tomatoes, chillies, strawberries, courgettes and a very healthy patio tub of fresh herbs, something we never ever imagined could happen from a handful of seeds! Perhaps to the expert gardeners it might sound really stupid, but for us amateurs, this was an eye-opening experience. We realized how much care and attention is needed to keep away those caterpillars that munched away most of our marigold leaves, or the aphid colonies that attacked the roses with vengeance, or all those courgettes that were nibbled off by squirrels even before they had a chance to grow. We realized how tough it is to stick to organic means to do all of this, and yet get a good yield! We also realized how dearly we started loving our plants, like they were our babies :o).

And yes, we also realized that if we are going to grow them freelance and organic and allow the good bugs to deal with the bad ones, we might as well allow the squirrels and caterpillars their little treats. We even tried to shift the caterpillars to the nettle plants, so that the birds stayed away from them! And so, we had to get seeds for birds as well, so that they stayed happy and well fed!

So far, it has been a summer of reflection : on things that matter, things that make you happy, things that are important, things that are simply to be, things that are better left alone, things that can change if the thinking changes and quite simply, things! For once, and am certainly not one to count blog posts more than sunny days spent outdoors, blogging or being online faded away into the background while fresh air and nature kicked in and established camps big time!

And here's a lovely post that reflects just the very mood ( Calvin and Hobbes, those darlings!).

Happy Holidays!!

A Monster Calls

Author and Illustrator: Patrick Ness
Original Story idea by: Siobhan Dowd
Ages: 13+

“Stories don't always have happy endings."This stopped him. Because they didn't, did they? That's one thing the monster had definitely taught him. Stories were wild, wild animals and went off in directions you couldn't expect.” 

What do you do when you are forced to face the worst fears of your life? What do you do when your nightmares are for real, when they are so tangible and facing them is the only option? What if the nightmares are so terrifying that even the presence of an eerie monster does not scare you one bit?

Conor is a teenager living with his Mum since Dad left them and went off to a different country. He is new to high school life and all the bullying, hatred, shames, fears and pressure that come with it. His mother is fighting a terminal illness, and though he fears oblivion so much that it haunts his nightmares, he refuses to believe it.

And then comes the monster to visit him. Exactly at 12:07 in the night every time. Dark, ominous and terrifying. But it does not scare Conor. He faces the monster with great ease and demands the reason for its presence. The monster says that he has been summoned by none other than Conor himself.

The monster says that it would tell Conor 3 parables by the end of which Conor should tell him his own true story or be banished from life forever. Connor objects, but isn't given any choice. He thinks that the monster is just imagination, but every time he wakes up the next morning, he sees little clues that make the monster's visit real.

While the monster continues to visit in the night with parables that question the very essence of "the good and the bad" as Conor perceives ( “There is not always a good guy. Nor is there always a bad one. Most people are somewhere in between.” ), Conor's days get worser and worser with the bullying in school and his mother's deteriorating health. He abhors the fact that his good friend went and told every one about his mother, because he hates all the pity that comes his way because of it - how his teachers give him extra perks, how his school mates give him the "loser" look and not really talk to him. Nobody knows how to talk to a person who has a tragedy in his life, so he is completely ignored almost as if he is invisible.

Conor is so deeply troubled by the pity and silent stares that he actually creates trouble in school and wills the Head teacher to punish him, because that would mean that they see him also as a normal high school boy worthy of punishment rather than a boy needing special care and attention because he has a dying mum. He simply wishes he were treated as a normal teenager - loved, hated, punished, praised, but certainly not shunned. And definitely not pitied.

“There was once an invisible man who had grown tired of being unseen. It was not that he was actually invisible. It was that people had become used to not seeing him.

And if no one sees you, are you really there at all?"” 

Mum is taken to hospital where treatments and options fail, Dad comes to visit but makes it clear that he would be an unwelcome guest back in his place. And then the worst thing happens - the monster demands Conor's story be told, failing which he would be banished into his nightmares forever. Conor finally reveals his nightmares to the monster. How he feels for wishing all the pain would end, which would mean his mother slipping away from him forever. How the waiting was much more painful than the end that Conor almost wished the end would happen soon.

“You were merely wishing for the end of pain, the monster said. Your own pain. An end to how it isolated you. It is the most human wish of all.” 

The monster asks him to come to face with all his worst fears. To accept the inevitable and acknowledge it.

"You wanted her to go at the same time you were desperate for me to save her. Your mind will believe comforting lies while also knowing the painful truths that make those lies necessary. And your mind will punish you for believing both.”

Finally, he learns to let his beloved mum go. To accept the truth.

“Conor held tightly onto his mother.
And by doing so, he could finally let her go.” 

It took me a good while to arrest the flood of tears. The monster's questions and statements are completely transcending. Not many books I've read have made me feel so raw, emotional and yet so connected. The soul of this book is to be read to be felt. Along with the haunting illustrations.

The Monster is a giant Yew tree. The Yew is always associated with ancient times, religion, the land and the people.  Some are thought to be so ancient that they are a few thousand years old. It is considered a symbol of immortality by some religions and always planted in churchyards. In some religions, though, it is looked upon as a symbol of doom and death. The fruits and leaves of the tree are highly poisonous.

A Monster Calls. Powerful.